GriefNet Guidelines

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Our primary guideline is that we be polite and respectful in responses to other subscribers. Rudeness or attacks on other people are not acceptable here.

Messages to this group must be kept private and confidential. Do not share messages with someone outside of this list without the author's permission. This helps make this group safer for people to find comfort and to heal.

Please restrict topics to those for which the list has been created, which is your grief. Discussions of unrelated issues often confuse new members just joining. Spam, chain letters, forwarded email, and letters requesting replies to off-list addresses are not allowed on any GriefNet lists. They cause our mail system to clog up and do not usually serve the purpose that we are here for: to share our grief and tell our own stories.

Please do not discuss religion or spiritual beliefs except in grief-religion or grief-spirits. Our membership is composed of people from all over the world who embrace a variety of faiths and religious beliefs. What comforts one person may greatly offend another. We do have two groups for discussion of religious or spiritual beliefs, which you may join by sending a request to

Humor in the form of jokes can be helpful but also possibly destructive, especially when the joke centers on controversial topics, uses overt sexual language, makes fun of someone because of their ethnic background, their sexual orientation, their religious or political affiliation, and probably numerous other antisocial themes. Use extreme discretion and post sparingly, please.

We discourage users from writing to each other privately. If someone has something to say that cannot be shared with the group, then it probably shouldn't be said at all. Never contact another member privately without first asking permission of that person from within the group. Remember that while we do a preliminary screening of our members, we have no way to guarantee that people actually are who they say they are. Remember also that the Internet is not a totally secure environment. There are many people on the Internet using it for monetary gain or self-glorification and sometimes they will, despite our best efforts, invade our space. We cannot keep all of the offenders out, but we will deal with them appropriately when they are detected. Meanwhile, never give out your personal information to a group. Do not share your phone number, your address, or anything else you would not wish anyone and everyone to know. Never hesitate to contact any of the GriefNet staff if you have concerns about someone in the group.

Products or services of any sort may not be discussed or recommended, either by supplying web addresses or by describing in detail the commercial venture. This includes recommending individual practitioners or organizations of any sort, or directing people to other internet sites.


Please do not use multiple addresses when sending messages to the groups, even if you plan to send the same message to other groups of which you are a member. Send each message separately. If you send messages to a number of people or groups at once, they may get stuck in our server or lost. Do not Cc: or Bcc: anyone when writing to the group.

Attachments are not permitted, as they can easily contain a computer virus, which can totally disable your computer. The same goes for any form of graphics, including messages in html. Use plain text only.


If you have any problem with sending or receiving mail, or difficulty unsubscribing, please write to If you have any other problems or concerns, write


Thank you for your attention to these guidelines,
and thank you for being an important part of GriefNet.

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